بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Notes from a lesson of Bukhārī Sharīf (13/09/14), taught by Hadhrat Muftī Ibrāhīm Raja Sāhib (dāmat barakātuhum):
The immoralities that have become a part of weddings today are completely misguided and we should save ourselves from participating in such gatherings. All aspects of ghayrat (honour, self-respect) disappear with immoral acts, such as free mixing and dancing, taking place. All such happenings are against the Shar’īah. Some believe it to be a fardh (obligation) upon them to attend all weddings and do not even acknowledge the commands of Allāh and His Rasūl ﷺ that are being broken.
A buzrūg (pious person) once saw the Prophet ﷺ in his dream. The Prophet ﷺ was crying and when the pious individual asked him why, he ﷺ replied that the weddings of this Ummah are causing him great difficulty and distress. The buzrūg then asked the Prophet ﷺ ‘until when will the trials that are being afflicted upon the Ummah remain?’ The Prophet ﷺ replied that as long as the women continue to dress immodestly and the immoralities in weddings remain, the ummah will continue to be afflicted with musībat (trials).
Many do not even consider these immoralities of music, dancing and the like to be sins. One is deprived of the tawfīq (ability) to do tawbah (repent) from that which one does not consider to be a sin.
There was a time when divorce was unheard of and was considered to be forbidden, but it has now become extremely common. We are often hearing of divorces of couples shortly after their wedding. Those things against the Shar’īah, such as music and free mixing, that take place in weddings are destroying the barakah (blessings) of marriages. We then witness the consequences of this loss of barakah when seeing divorces take place. The Prophet ﷺ said, “The most blessed Nikāh is the one in which least expenses are occurred” (Mishkāt). The more a wedding is in accordance to the sunnah of our beloved Messenger ﷺ, the more barakah there will be in the marriage.
A buzrūg had once come to visit the UK and was passing by a wedding that consisted of music and women dressed immodestly. He told the people he was with to take him away from there quickly as he feared the punishment of Allāh descending on this place. He did not even want to pray in the masjid that was nearby due to this fear. It is a sign of Qiyāmah (Resurrection) that when music and dancing become common, the Ummah will be afflicted with punishments the likes of earthquakes, storms and harsh winds.
It is not impermissible to attend weddings, but we must make the intention to avoid those that go against the commands of Allāh. Three-course meals can be sacrificed for His sake and for the sake of His Messenger ﷺ. Some fuqahā (jurists) have even deemed attending such functions, where sins are openly taking place, as harām (forbidden). Imām Abū Hanīfah (rahimahullāh) once attended a dinner when he witnessed a sin taking place; he immediately got up from there and left. Such occasions are meant for goodness – not sin and immorality.
It is especially not befitting of an ‘ālim or ‘ālimah to attend such a gathering. On the Day of Judgement, we can say to Allāh that, although we were not able to stop these sins, we did not attend (or we left) as our hearts were not accepting of them. Thus, we must make an intention to stay away from those weddings that are of disobedience to Allāh and against the Shar’īah.
Allāh grant us the ability to take heed and act upon the advices of Hadhrat Muftī Sāhib D.B. (āmīn).
يَا رَبِّ صَلِّ وَ سَلِّم دَائِمًا أَبَدًا عَلَى حَبِيبِكَ خَيرِ الخَلْقِ كُلِّهِمِ
‘Ibād-ur-Rahmān 